Journey for Answers – Chapter 29 “Early Goodbye”

Soft folk music was playing from the stereo and Matthews’ ears moved for a tiny moment. He could feel awake, but he didn’t want to, he liked mingling between being awake or asleep. On the other hand, he thought about opening his eyes. Just out of curiosity he wanted to know the reason how music started playing. Thinking that one of them two are awake. Matthew could feel a soft and warm hand touching his chest; a quiet sound of exhaling air was coming from the right side, while music from the stereo was hushing any other sound. Gently he rolled to the right side, to the source of warm air. He could feel the warm breath of one of them, but he couldn’t know which one. Tingled with curiosity he opened his eyes and saw Janna staring right back at him. She was looking into his blue eyes, feeling lost like in the crystal blue ocean color.

“Rise and shine darlings,” Hanna swang open vans side door.

She was standing outside of it, brushing teeth and inhaling fresh air, for which her body craved the whole night. Her body was cover with nothing but a long shirt, a lot longer then she should wear. After spitting out foamy toothpaste from her mouth she leaned forward them.

“Darling, if you keep staring into each other like that, I might get jealous,” Hanna leaned forward and kissed Janna on her forehead, slapping her ass while raising back up “Come on, the day won’t start it by itself.”

Janna gave a last look into Matthews’ eyes and got up. She rubbed her eyes while Matthew remained sleeping right beside her. Matthew could sleep for more hours because it was the most pleasantest sleep he had in a while.

“Come on. Come on up Matthew.” Janna smiled at Matthew and started pulling up pants.

“Just five minutes.” He said

Janna chuckle slightly “As you wish sunflower.”

Laughingly she jumped out of a van and kissed Hanna. Both girls were getting ready for the setting off to their path, while Matthew was still rolling in their sheets, trying to wake up. Warm sunbeams in the early morning made it harder for him to get out of there. Van was filled with the smell of beer and folk music. Matthew got up and sat on the mattress in their van. The whole van looked a lot like his, from the inside. It seemed that Hanna liked to decorate the holy crap out of it, and Matthew could see familiarities in there. For him, it seemed like she is another wild child driving from the west or the east. It hardly mattered because he could tell that she moves constantly, without settling down. Curiously he kept checking out every angle inside the van while getting ready for the day and searching for his pants. Hanna howled for Matthew, asking if he wants something for the breakfast from the shop. Matthew lid up in surprise after she asked him.

“But there’s no shop anywhere around here.” He said.

“Oh honey,” she pointed to the building not so far away from them “See that? It’s a few minute walk. They probably have something for the breakfast.”

“What’s the time by the way?” Matthew asked

“Somewhere past seven or eight I would say. I don’t know for sure.”

“It’s ten past eight,” Janna added

“Thanks, darling,”

Hanna kissed her on the cheek and repeated the question to Matthew, and the only thing he asked her was an apple. Matthew didn’t felt hungry right after waking up. He watched how Hanna started walking towards the shop and Janna, who was finishing up with her teeth brushing. Feeling that he should do the same he asked her for toothpaste and went after his toothbrush from the van. Once he opened the door he could smell the nasty smell of the sweet and humid air. For a moment he wondered what could make such a smell, but then, after glancing over Mike and Caroline who were still in deep sleep his curiosity about it stopped. With right hand he waved air in front of his face, mixing fresh air and air from the van together. Without checking anything else he grabbed the toothbrush from his bag, which laid between both front seats. After squeezing paste from the tube, he turned around to give the toothpaste back but stumbled into Janna, who was now standing in front of him. She didn’t talk much, but her body did. Her body asked for the warm lovely feeling which emitted from Matthew. Matthew didn’t state it, but apparently, she pictured him as a lovely teddy bear. Janna didn’t let him say anything and hugged him. They both stood for a minute, standing still and slightly swinging their bodies. Chuckle set them both apart. Janna stepped a few steps back, without moving her eyes away from Matthews. Confused in his mind and trying to be present he leaned his back against his van and overlooked Janna. The walking beauty in her long shirt and lingering cotton pants. She walked slowly backward without turning away from Matthew, and he looked at her while brushed his teeth. Their both eyes kept staring into each other. Smiles on their faces raised and Matthew set off a chuckle which continued on Janna’s face. They were goofing around in this sunny morning, which had a slight breeze coming from the ground. She stopped looking into his hypnotic eyes once she saw Hanna in the distance.

Sun started hovering above the horizon, and in the front of that sun appeared she. Hanna in loose boots and long loose shirt, which mingled almost at her knees. She was coming back with a smile on her face like she witnessed a miracle at the shop. In one hand she had a cotton bag, where probably was Matthews apple with other stuff from the shop. Janna started skipping towards her once she saw her, and they both hugged in laughter. Matthew kept looking at them both and for a second he thought they could be sisters in a different scenario. While in reality, they were two girls who became sisters by choice, sharing and caring to each other.

“Hey, Matthew!”

Hanna shouted while a throwing an apple towards Matthew. With a toothbrush in his mouth, he managed to catch it with his both hands and smiled right after. He couldn’t say anything because toothpaste in his mouth was complicating the whole mouth moving part. He raised his thumb as a thanks gesture and finished off with teeth brushing.

Both girls were now beginning to set off. They grabbed their stuff and shoved it in the back of their van. Hanna pulled out freshly baked bread and few tomatoes she just bought. Janna took them off her hands while Hanna went for a smoke.

“So. Matthew. What happens to you now?” Hanna asked while lighting up a cigarette

“Now? Now I must get to Amsterdam in days time. Probably go without a stop.”

“Something precious awaiting you there since you want to get there in a days time? Because it seems like it.”

“Honestly. Yes, but I’m not sure if it’s the other way around.”

“Uhhhh. Is it a girl?” Janna jumped out of a van and hugged Hanna from behind.

“Yes. A friend of mine who I know from childhood.”

“Must be a long time since you saw each other.”

“Not really. We met a week or so ago, but departed from each other in a very painful way… as she said… in a letter.” Matthews head lowered and he bit into the apple.

“Sounds harsh, here, let me help you.” Hanna stepped forward and hugged him to comfort. Janna joined them. The group hug felt like a goodbye from girls because right after it Hanna jumped into a van and started the engine. It didn’t sounded as loud as Matthews, but he could hear old times screaming out of it. Janna grabbed Matthews hand and put in at her cheek.

“So this is it Matthew, the end of our journey, or beginning of it. All depends on you. Wish you safe travels. We’ll be thinking about you,”

Janna kissed him on a cheek and jumped in a van, besides Hanna. She rolled down the window and screamed while they began driving.


She waved him a goodbye and they drove away. Matthew stood watching as they drove away. His back laid against the door of his van, while he drifted way in his mind. Matthew tried to understand why she was so kind to him and what was the thing she saw in him that made her come so close to him. Matthew once again was swimming in the thoughts of his own reality, until Mikes’ voice snapped him out of it.

“Matthew!” Mikes head leaned out of the window of the van and stared into Matthews’ face “Should we get moving or I can settle myself for another day here?”

“Yeah, let’s move.”

Matthew jumped behind the wheel and with a head full of doubts, he turned the key into the ignition. Surprisingly he heard the sound of old engine gurgling in the back. He could see happiness in Mikes’ face, how he couldn’t stop jumping on the passengers’ seat with his butt. Matthew gave a small moment for the engine to warm up and drove off to the border separating the next country.

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